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I’ve mentioned in previous posts that I can be superstitious about silly things (especially for a reasonable, analytical person like me) and that was definitely true all throughout our IF treatments, and carried into pregnancy. One of my superstitions is to do with Murphy’s Law, in that if you make plans, anything that can go wrong, will. Lately, my mind keeps thinking “what if our baby is in fact…not a girl”. We are ready, in that we have all of the stuff we think we’ll need. But it’s all girl stuff. Granted we did a blood test to detect fetal DNA for determining gender, plus our sonographer was pretty confident at our anatomy scan that she is in fact a girl. I’m pretty sure it’s silly to worry about, doesn’t happen often (please don’t share the horror stories with me!) but my mind just goes there. It wouldn’t be the end of the world but it would be a huge pain in the ass!
Another thing I am very protective, and superstitious of is her name. It has been a secret, mainly to avoid unwanted comments but also sort of to keep her for ourselves. The other day I was in a shop and the cashier asked when I was due, if I knew the gender, if we had a name picked out, ect. I answered all of her questions and she asked me what the name was. Previously when asked this by a random person I’ve either lied and said we don’t know, or told them it’s a secret. But for some reason, I told this woman. Perhaps because we’re so close to the end, and there was no one else around. But as soon as I did it I felt awful. J was waiting for me outside the shop, with our dogs, and I didn’t tell him what happened. I felt like I had betrayed him.
The only person who has the power of the jinx is me, I just need to let it go.