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There is a question that every infertile-turned-parent dreads; when are you having another? I haven’t exactly been outright asked (yet), but the topic has come up.
I have a weekly meetup with some moms that all met through a new moms group, and a couple weeks ago one of the moms asked if anyone was thinking of another baby. Most ladies shook their heads, as most of us have babies around six months old, it’s still a bit soon for most to be considering it. One of the moms is getting married this summer and she indicated a desire to get pregnant after the wedding. I kept mum and just shook my head, that no I would not want another anytime soon. It did come up at one point in our moms groups meetings that I conceived via IVF but I’m not sure anyone remembers.
The other day I was at my chiropractors office and there was another woman with a baby close to C’s age. We got to chatting a bit and somehow work came up, and she asked if I was going back to work after my mat. leave finished, to which I said yes. She replied with, “Oh just get enough hours in and do it all over again?” (meaning work my minimum number of hours to qualify for mat. leave again). I told her, no, that we may only have one or wait until she is closer to going to school before having another. She seemed momentarily taken aback, but did give some sort of polite, non-committal response before being rescued from our convo by the doctor.
I know these are just the first of what is sure to become a recurring conversation for the next several years until we either decide to try for another (and succeed or not…), or decide our family is complete with the three of us. I won’t even get started on the debate people get into about only children.
Just when you think your done with the “when are you going to have kids” question, it starts all over again.