Taking Up Space

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Babies have a lot of stuff. Our house is overrun. Play mat and mamaroo in the living room, exersaucer in the kitchen (another one in the loft), an entire bathroom full of baby paraphernalia and toys abound! And the clothes, don’t even get me started on the clothes… I welcome it all, though I am a bit of a minimalist so the excess stuff bugs me a bit, but it’s all for our baby girl, so it’s ok. 

As she began growing out of things, I’ve started pulling them from drawers and putting them in boxes; either keep or donate/pass along. We have a rock n’ play that she no longer uses, sitting in our bedroom and the mamaroo is gathering dust. But what to do with all of it? We live in a condo, and space is limited. We don’t have anywhere to store all of this excess baby stuff for the next one, if there is a next one. At this point we don’t know if we want another,  and if we should be so lucky to have another we don’t know when it would be, or if we have a boy the clothes will be kept all for naught. 

The thought constantly niggles in the back of my brain. We have so much, and we are so fortunate; do we want to start all over if we have another? It wouldn’t be the end of the world but for now these are cherished items that I’m not far enough removed from to be able to let them go. And from a practicality point it would save us a lot not having to replace everything. I hate that it’s something I constantly think of. 

I suppose it’s not just an infertile problem but I feel it weighs more heavily on me because what if we decide to try for another and it doesn’t happen? When will we be ready to try again? These boxes of clothes and the yearly storage fees for our frozen embryos feel like pressure all over again. I’ve always leaned towards only having one child, or at least spacing two out by several (3-4) years (if I am so lucky to choose that route and succeed in having another) so it sucks to have this tangible reminder of the decisions to come. No matter what we choose, both paths bring difficulties. We either enter back into treatment to pursue another child and all of the emotional turmoil that brings up, or decide our family is complete the way it is and make a decision on our frost babies. So that’s really what it boils down to, not so much the space the stuff takes up in my house, but the weight it places on my heart. 

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16 thoughts on “Taking Up Space

  1. pcosandpizza.blogspot.com

    Yes I am
    Constantly trying to keep the bsby items neat. It is a struggle for sure but people have constsntly commented my house looks nice so I think I am doing ok with all the stuff!

    Even though we have the twins I think of this too. Do I want to but everything again? How long do I keep everything “just in case?”‘I refuse to go thru treatment again but if we were to try naturally then that would really be opening an old wound to look at baby stuff as we are struggling to succeed. Ugh, sucks being proactive and analytical sometimes!

  2. Put stuff in storage, I think it’s too early to make a firm decision. It’s just one of those lovely gifts infertility leaves behind, that the whole babymaking process is so grueling.

    • Yeah, I’m definitely not ready to make any decisions so for now it is just piling up in a corner but hopefully I can stick it in all in someone’s basement for the time being…

  3. Jen

    It’s tough with a smaller place deciding on that….but if I were you I’d keep everything for now. Maybe you can leave it in a family members garage? Just a thought. It really is SO MUCH stuff!!

  4. nonsequiturchica

    We kept all of our baby stuff that we will hopefully get to use again in July. All of the various contraptions are so expensive that if I were you, I would keep them. Even if you don’t use them as long as you find a place to store them it will be much less expensive to pull them out if you do decide to have another baby.

    • Yeah, that’s where I’m torn. If I knew that I for sure wanted another (even if I didn’t know when) I would find somewhere to keep it. But I’m not sure, so all the stuff just feels like pressure to decide what I want in the future. I think I’m just going to willfully ignore it until it starts creeping out of the little nooks and crannies I have it tucked in for now.

  5. Well said! I have three huge boxes of stuff that Jude has outgrown and he’s only 6 months. Keeping it will only make sense if we have another baby and if that baby is a boy.
    We have decided on the age gap we’d like which sees Jude going to kindy before we try again. That way we focus all our energy on Jude before sending him to learning and care in a school environment. In the hope that each child is getting a big slice of attention where they need it.
    So say that is four years away… do I really keep all those clothes just in case the stars align again and with the same gender?
    Or give away the clothes and focus on what I have now…
    Hmm.

  6. I can’t even face the thought of giving up any baby stuff (so far I keep outgrown clothes boxed in the basement, and I throw out mommy and daddy’s old junk to make room lol). The question of when/if another is always on my mind. I wish I had answers, I don’t. At least you know you might have a preference for one child, that’s something. If doesn’t make the decisions easy but maybe you can feel that it’s more up to you than just fate.

  7. I also don’t really want to get rid of my baby items but I also don’t have anywhere to store them safely. Part of me knows it silly to hang on to every single thing but I just can’t part yet willingly.

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