Uncharted Territory

Monday morning I had a monitoring appointment to check my lining, in preparation for my transfer. They brought me in sooner than they normally would have since I have had so many issues trying to get this FET on track. As the doctor began moving the wand around to view my uterus and lining I knew what was going to happen before he said anything. My lining measured at 8.4mm, my ovaries were quiet, and there were no large, ominous blobs indicating the return of either of the cysts. It is transfer time this Saturday.

Dr. C finished the ultrasound, and told me I’d speak to the nurse after. The nurse gave me instructions for the day of transfer, and my new meds regime, discontinuing Lupron and adding vaginal progesterone. I take my Estrace and my progesterone 3 times daily now, and will continue on for 10 weeks if we achieve pregnancy.

I am excited, scared, nervous; all of the above and more, about the transfer. I know the process itself will be ok. I’m sure I will be dying from having a full bladder, but that’s survivable. We’ve never been this close before, and it is exhilarating, hope-inducing, and frightening all at the same time. I’m trying not to hold out too much hope but at least we are moving forward with something. The wait is going to kill me, this I know. It could be a really good Christmas, or a really bad one. Teetering on the brink, which way will we fall…