#Microblog Mondays: Tears

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Infertility has given me a lot of reasons to cry, yet I don’t. Why that is, I do not know.

They threaten to appear, sometimes with the tightness in my chest, sometimes with the chokehold on my throat. Other times they make it all the way to the rims of my eyelids but they do not fall. I don’t blink them away, or swallow them down, sometimes they would be a welcome release. A much needed outlet of emotion.

They come in unexpected waves, rising up at an unexpected turn, but never do they fall from my eyes and roll down my cheeks. Perhaps they’re waiting for the day when they can be happy tears instead.

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14 thoughts on “#Microblog Mondays: Tears

    • Yes, I think that is true, the worst hurts don’t always create immediate tears. I think too since the situation is so fluid, the tears don’t come because there is no finality, or closure.

  1. I’ve experienced that kind of pause before sometimes and just so wanted the release. It happens more when I am angry/sad. For me, it eventually comes, even if delayed. I’m sorry to hear about your sadness and frustration. I hope by writing it helps to let some of it out.

    • Mine will usually come later, from something more minor but everything else behind it will come forward. Writing does help, so hopefully it will somewhat lessen the outburst when it comes…

  2. here from the Round-up. I love this meditation. I did cry at times through my IF journey, although not often. But I will never forget the happy tears at my baby’s birth. I wish you many happy tears!

  3. Also here from the Roundup. In my experience, sometimes it is so hard to wait for that emotional release we need and other times the tears come without warning. In the midst of your IF journey is such a difficult place to be. I hope that your happy tears will come soon.

  4. Beautiful post, I love the idea of your tears waiting for the chance to be happy ones. Those are the best kind. (Someday I hope to have them myself…) Wishing many happy tears for your future!

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