Well folks I’m back! The downside of limited internet access on a cruise ship is I couldn’t keep up with you all. I did go back through 10 days worth of blogs and I am finally caught up, couldn’t really comment on everyone, but much love to you all! I’ve missed following everyone, and am glad to be reconnected. The good part with the lack of internet, I barely had time to hit up Facebook. And two of my friends had babies while I was gone, so I’m glad I was able to avoid that while I was trying to put IF out of my mind. I feel like I have a million and one things to talk about now, but I’ll start where I left off; vacation.
It was lovely and relaxing. We shopped, we ate, we scuba dived (scuba dove?) a lot, we worshipped the sun and we ate some more. The vacation on a whole was very good. I read the Kite Runner (finally, after hearing nothing but rave reviews for years about it). It was very good, but sad, and surprisingly touched on infertility in the story (sorry if you haven’t read it yet!). I thought about IF a lot less, like maybe once or twice a day it crossed my mind. Which for me is good, normally it’s all consuming. My anxiety eased, I slept well and overall felt pretty good.
Can I just take a second to tell those of you who do not scuba dive how amazing it is? It is probably one of the most amazing (once you get past the freaked out feeling of breathing from a tank and being encompassed by the never ending sea) experiences. It is a slow moving, slow breathing, and quiet (except for the noise of your breathing and the bubbles) activity. Your main objective is just to take everything in. Investigate all of the sea life, the beautiful corals, the amazing colored fish, the turtles (yes turtles!) and the plethora of other creatures, some of which you would never know existed. If you’ve never done it, I’d highly recommend giving it a try. It was something I never saw myself doing until my brother in law suggested a bunch of us get certified, and now I can’t get enough.
Anyways, towards the end of the trip, when we had to start thinking about packing up and going home the anxiety started creeping back in. The thought of returning to work made my stomach turn. Getting away from work and everything else was awesome, but it just made it that much harder to go back. Now again, obviously my job is a small problem in a bigger whole. But it is what I spend a good chunk of my time doing, if it wasn’t another annoyance on my plate then I don’t think it would be so bad.
So yesterday I resent my resume to the company that had flat out offered me a job back in March. I see on their website they’re still hiring for the same positions so I feel like if I want it I can probably still have it. I want to see the offer and what the benefits package looks like first, and then go from there. But having something on the back burner is comforting, though leaving my current job will be really tough if it comes to that. I’ll cross that bridge if/when I get there.
Also on the job front J has been contacted by another location for a transfer. The regional recruiter and the location’s specific manager have both been in contact. He’s still playing telephone tag with the direct manager (we just got back on Sunday, so he just called them back yesterday). Again, it may lead to nothing, so we’re not getting our hopes up. We’ll just have to wait and see what comes of it.
On the IF front, I am on CD4 today. Good ‘ol AF showed up on the day we were flying home. So not only was I super bummed about coming home but I also failed at a natural cycle (not that I’m surprised or anything, the timing was just…blech). It’s a good thing I felt her presence earlier in the week and had the sense to pack some tampons in my carry on. So I got to fly feeling all bloat-y, crampy and gross. Then we hit our connecting city only to find out our luggage never got put on our first flight, along with 50% of the rest of the passengers. Awesome. For those of you that ever have the misfortune of flying with Air Canada; I’m sorry, and please don’t judge my country by our shitty airline.
We landed at home and it was SNOWING! So I went from 30 degrees Celsius to snow in the same day. Boo. We did eventually get our luggage back 24 hrs later. They broke the handle off mine so now I have to fight then for compensation, but that’s another thing. It is still eff-ing cold here. The weather man cheerily reminded everyone yesterday that although it only reached a high of something like 6 degrees, that on May. 6 last year it was a balmy 30 degrees. Thanks, because that’s really helpful right now when I’m freezing my arse off.
So anywho, back to AF. I did my CD3 bloodwork yesterday because they wanted to update it leading into IVF. I also had a requisition for Antral follicle count ultrasound and that has to be done between day 2 – 4 so I called yesterday to confirm that for today. I also booked my saline infusion sonohysterogram for next week. I had some days off during the week so I figured I may as well just get it all done since I have the time. I did the Antral follicle count today, but that’s going to be a whole other post.
So in summary; Vacations are awesome, but now I’m back and, reality bites.
*Side note, J bought an e-cigarette when we were in Houston, and although he is still on a small dose of nicotine with that, it is better than actual cigarettes. And soon he can wean down to nothing. Plus we are starting our new supplements regime today. Bring it!